Where is our heart during worship?

I've been thinking and praying a lot lately for our church; in fact, Joe & I both have. Joe has taken some steps of faith in challenging and encouraging other men to be part of the "solution" to the issues and challenges facing our church. It got me thinking, as well as some of the reading I've been doing, about how we even enter into our home church. When we have our own quiet time with God, it usually is a pretty personal experience. I mean, it's just me and God in those moments. I pray that He would guide me, teach me and show me what He's wanting to work on my heart about. BUT...do I pray that before walking in to church on Sunday morning? Do I put that much personal attention into my "Sunday worship experience"? Or, do I instead attend it as if it's me walking in on someone else's worship experience and quiet time with God? Are we attending a "preview" of what the pastor is learning in his quiet time? Is that how God meant our Sunday mornings to be spent? NO, I don't think so at least. So then I asked myself how can we make it more personal, how I can invest and learn from it?

And it takes me to the heart of the issue, which is the heart! Where is my heart at on Sunday morning? Sometimes I feel like it is right where it should be, open and ready for whatever it is that God wants to teach me or have me experience. But, other times sadly to say, it is closed up and wanting to watch and criticize someone else's experience. Well, if my heart is closed to what God may want to teach me that day, then of course I am not going to think it was a great sermon on Sunday morning. And, it may in fact be not a great sermon anyway, but the point is - if your heart is open to what God wants to teach you, then He can in fact teach it to you through anyone or anything. It is our responsibility to make "church" a personal experience. Yes, our pastors are responsible for tending their sheep, but as mature believers, we cannot pretend to be little lambs who can't find their way...it's a balance and takes work on each of our parts. But if we are not doing our best to make every day a day where we strive to honor God and allow Him to speak into our lives, then why are we surprised when we don't feel we are learning anything? Go figure!

And I'm talking about our entire church/worship experience. To me, a "worship service" is whatever your Sunday church experience includes...singing/praising, sermons, serving in nursery, setting up or tearing down. All these things are part of our worship experience because we can worship God in any and all of those aspects of a Sunday morning church experience. So, if we invite God to meet us there, meet us where we are at, He can (and wants to) teach us and use us at each of those experiences.

It reminds me of the song, "The Heart of Worship" written by Matt Redman. The story of how and why he wrote the song is great! He was at a church where the pastor felt that the congregation was not where they needed to be and not contributing, so he asked the question "When you come through the doors on a Sunday, what are you bringing as your offering to God?” They got rid of all music and sound system as their church sought God. This led Matt to write the song. It's explained in more detail at http://www.crosswalk.com/1253122/.
Some of the lyrics say:

When the music fades, all is stripped away, and I simply come / Longing
just to bring something that’s of worth that will bless your heart… / I’m coming
back to the heart of worship, and it’s all about You, Jesus...

Is it all about Jesus? Are we there to serve Him, praise Him, learn from Him and grow with others? Or, are we there to seek some kind of feeling induced by someone else's quiet times? Like I wrote earlier, we can view it as a bad sermon or a great sermon, but it's up to us to truly seek God's heart through that message so that it can still speak to us and teach us something. So, as we try to include God in our lives, hopefully daily, we need not forget about Sunday! Just because we go to church doesn't mean we don't need to include Him in that day as well.

Kids say...

There are so many things the girls say that are either hilarious, or rather profound for their age. I keep meaning to write them down, so as I hear, or remember some, I'm just going to post them.



Felicity (age 4) the other day asked "When do we get to take a train to France?" I said "well, we'd have to fly to Europe and then take a train; however, it costs a lot of money so it will not be for a very long time!" She said, "okay, I'll save my money and maybe we can go when I'm 16."....yeah, we'll see about that ;)



Callie (age 2) - I was about to change her diaper and she was holding a little bible, so I took it to put down while I changed her and she said "no, hold Jesus!"...can't argue w/ that :)

What does simplifying really mean?

"You are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary
has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her." Luke
10:41-42 (NIV)

A common passage about Mary & Martha, but it's been a while since I've sat down to really understand what Jesus was saying to Martha. In the midst of reading this amazing book, Breathe, by Keri Wyatt Kent, I was brought to this Mary & Martha verse randomly through something else. It made me connect the two to understand a little better about not only simplifying our lives, but simplifying it for a purpose...a relational and spiritual purpose.

These days everyone is so busy; in fact, whenever someone asks how I'm doing, my answer is usually "fine, just busy"...why is that? Am I so fine that I don't have time to connect with the person asking how I'm doing? So why do I feel the need to simplify my life? It seems like a silly question in which you would answer "well, duh!" But, the truth is that I need to refocus my life, my goals, my relationships. And if I am not walking hand in hand with my heavenly Father, then why would He bless all of the other things or goals in my life. It's not that I don't spend time with God, but I often think just because I am doing something for Jesus, that I am doing it with Jesus...begs the question - are we so busy doing things for Him that we cannot find the time to spend with Him? That was Martha's problem - she was so busy cooking, cleaning, etc. for her guest that she neglected the guest himself. Our lives should not be about our "guests" but about the relationships we're building with them. And if I am so busy with so many things, then I am not building relationships the way God intended me to; especially the relationship with Him.

This brings me to the book, Breathe, that I'm currently reading. Kent explains the reason for writing the book in this way

"...because I want to learn more about how to live at a saner pace. Why?
Because the pace of our lives has profound implications upon the depth of our
lives. I don't want to just skim the surface of life; I want to have deep and
meaningful relationships with my family, my friends, God. And this I do
know: you can't hurry love."

I love the way she relates the depth of her life to her relationships. If our pace of life is so fast and hurried, then everything in our lives is also hurried. Is that how I want people to view me, as a hurried friend? I need to slow down to focus on what's important in life, starting with spending time with the Father, having a true meaningful relationship with Him.

That relationship with the Father, too, will reflect our pace of life. I know I'm quoting a bit too much of this book (and I've only read 2 chapters....yikes!), but I love the way she writes!!

"Any spiritual practice, from solitude to service, must be approached in an
unhurried fashion, or the benefits of the practice itself will be lost.
Connection with God, which is the reason for any spiritual practice, begins with
changing our focus (from ourselves and our problems to God and his sufficiency)
and changing our pace (from hurried and distracted to deliberate and focused).
That is what simplicity, slowing and Sabbath-keeping force us to do."

So, in essence, we need to focus on God and his sufficienty with deliberation and focus - I am not doing that in my busy, hurried day by any means!! This really makes me adjust my view of "being a Mary in a Martha world"...slowing down to focus and spend quality time with those important to us! Heck, I should know what quality time is; that is my love language!! Joe would never try to give me his 10 minutes of free time and think it is expressing true love to me...why should I expect God to settle for that either?

Frusterated Moments

Yesterday was a rough day...to say the least! It started out bad and got worse...or so it seemed at the moment. Poor Callie started throwing a fit at 7:30 am on our way to get the oil changed. It was on and off, literally, until 11am. Unlike Felicity, who although she would scream and yell during time out but would stay where we put her, Callie knows she can get up, come out, follow us around, etc. So, now I just hold onto her door when she's fighting it. The rule is if she's throwing a fit, she can come out when she is all done (meaning she's not throwing a fit anymore). But she comes out, or is behind her door yelling, "all done, all done". I explain to her that when she is all done, she will not be screaming and yelling anymore. Anyway, I could go on about how it went back and forth, how she fell asleep for a minute until I found her on her chair w/ her paci (which is supposed to stay in her bed) and how I woke her up by taking a picture of it, but I'll get to the point...well, one of the my points I guess. During one of those 10 or 20 minute periods where I was keeping her in her room, I just stood there, outside of her door, praying and asking that God would keep me calm and know how to help her understand and obey. The entire morning I just kept wondering if this is character building, what else am I in for? I know it's not that bad, but in the moment, it is quite frusterating!

And then there's Felicity...praise the Lord that their bad days are not on the same day! She knows me and knows to keep calm when Callie is acting like that. So after naps, etc. we go to the grocery store. Callie, of course, is whining about something most of the time. She has to stay in the cart while Felicity walks and stays with me (for the most part). At one point, Felicity asks "mommy, I'm being good today, aren't I? All day, right?" I said, "yes, Felicity you have been so good today and I really appreciate that!" She proceeds to explain to me "I want to be good ALL day because I don't want to frusterate you; isn't it good that I don't frusterate you?" I definitely told her how proud of her I was and how much I loved her, I also explained how much I love Callie, even when she acts like that. We talked for a few minutes about how even when we have frusterating moments, it doesn't change our love for someone. But, she was being so sweet and was just blessing me in that moment, knowing what I needed!!

I love my girls so much....even in those frusterating moments!! It's amazing how God continues to use my girls to teach me some great lessons! And at the end of the day, Callie will climb up on my lap, give me tons of kisses and love on me and I couldn't be more in love with that little girl....even though she sure knows how to give me some frusterating moments! And when Callie is like that, it kind of encourages Felicity to be a little more cuddly as well, since she's not usually that much of a snugglebug ;)

Felicity and Callie are truly some of the most valuable teachers; God sure has His way of speaking to us right where we're at :)